My full name is Carly Marie Senteno. The origin of my first name comes from my dad, Carlos. On the night of my birth, he had front row tickets to see Van Halen one of their last tours. Needless to say he missed that concert, but my mom wanted to name me after him because of it. My middle name originates from my maternal grandmother, whom my mother was very close to. Her first name is Maria, but everyone always called her Marie, even my mom. My mom said she knew I was going to resemble her—which I do—and decided to name me after her. My last name comes from my father’s family. It comes from the Spanish last name Centeno, being a surname for someone who worked with rye.
I do sometimes feel embarrassed by my name because it doesn’t sound ethnic enough. I have always struggled with not feeling Mexican enough because I don’t necessarily resemble what a Mexican person typically looks like and I don’t speak the language either. I always asked my mom why she didn’t name me something more connected to our culture, and her response is always surrounding the fact that she hates that people can never pronounce her name, Rocio (row-see-oh), and she didn’t wish the same embarrassment on us.
I have never changed my name, but I often like to tell others that don’t know me as well that my middle name is Maria. It just makes me feel slightly more connected to my Mexican identity. I have always grown up listening to my mother and her family speaking Spanish, and I did speak quite a bit when I was young. I wanted to stop speaking it because I always felt embarrassed. I have always been shamed for not speaking Spanish by my family and other people.