I was previously a home school teacher for two kids, ages nine and eleven. I absolutely loved teaching them. It was this specific job that confirmed for me that I did actually want to make teaching my career. Being a home school teacher gave me the flexibility to teach the kids their content at whatever pace was the most beneficial to them. We could hustle through all of our work for the day for a few hours or we could work nice and slow throughout the day with breaks in between just as is implemented in public schools. I was able to schedule the students academic work at different times as their personal growth tasks in order to be able to work with them one on one for most of their academic work. While Alexis worked on her piano recital, I could work with Zach in the areas he struggled in such as Latin. Similarly, while Alexis and I focused on her big presentation on George Washington, Zach could practice his basketball drills.
While this job gave me a lot of freedom and confidence in my abilities as a teacher, it tossed me in the deep end in terms of personal boundaries with the children. I spent upwards of seven or eight hours with these two kids four days a week. On the fifth day, they went to their charter school to get their assignments and present their work to their peers. On this day, I also volunteered in their classes in order to help the short staffed tutors. I spent the majority of our time together in their home. It began to become apparent to me that I was confused about the boundaries between being their teacher and being their friend. While it did work in my benefit that they enjoyed spending time with me, it made it difficult to discern where the personal boundaries should be. Should they have known so much about me and my personal life apart from them? Should be allowed to know where Zach hides his cookies from his parents? Should I know that Alexis feeds rabbits in the barn on their family’s property?
Before I had the time to figure this out, one of the tutors at the school saw Zach hug me goodbye as he was running to his classroom’s presentations on the plant cycle. She came up to me and scolded me for how inappropriate it was and that she would be calling the kids’ mother immediately. I remember being so shocked and confused. If he was comfortable hugging me and I was comfortable with it as well what was the big deal? But as I thought back to my experiences in a traditional public school setting I realized I had never hugged any of my teachers or knew such personal information about them. I made it a point to educate myself on proper boundaries between teachers and students and did my best to consult them as I continued as their teacher. I was honest with both kids and their parents that I had been scolded for crossing boundaries and that even though they thought it was perfectly appropriate, I wanted to conform to a more traditional teacher-student relationship.
Teacher-student relationships are very hard to navigate. I am eternally grateful for how much I learned from being a home-school teacher and am excited to contribute what I learned into a more traditional school setting.